Wild Rice Stuffed Pumpkins

I'm handy with a whisk and a screwdriver.

 I am really excited about this recipe.  Not only because it's orange and involves tucking food inside more food, but because I made it up!  I know.  I'm awesome.  (And I was inspired by several awesome friends and cooks who have made other pumpkin-stuffed beauties.)

So here's what you'll need, and be prepared for a larger-than-usual grocery bill:

2 medium-sized pumpkins, about the size of a kindergartener's head
1 cup wild rice (or wild rice blend, like the one I used)
2 cups chicken stock
1 Tbsp butter + more for smearing and sauteing (total? about 4 Tbsp)
1 Tsp salt + more to taste

7 garlic cloves, hacked into big chunks (just do it)

1 medium onion, chopped

3 celery stalks, diced

20ish mushrooms, sliced

1/3 lb Gruyere cheese, grated

3/4 cup hazelnuts

1/2 tsp ground nutmeg (as fresh as you can get it)

Before they get their rice filling, those pumpkins need to bake for a while at 350.  I'd say an hour is a good amount of time.  But scrape out the guts first.  How?  After surveying a group of my most serious foodies on Facebook and using my imagination, I decided to carve it... well, like a pumpkin.  Saw around the top with a paring knife or serrated knife, then find some sort of thin metal object to catapult the lid across your kitchen.  I used a flathead screwdriver, but a crowbar would work, too.

Once the guts are out, smear the insides of the squash with butter, put the lids back on your squashes and place them in a 9x13" pan (I prefer Pyrex).  Open oven, insert pan.  Bake - like I said - for an hour.  While you wait...

Hazelnuts.  Pretty.

Throw the rice, butter, stock, and salt into a pot and cook yourself some grain.  I'm not gonna walk you through this process.  You're no dummy.

Next, saute up the following the garlic and onion, adding a swish of salt (because that's what fancy cooks do).  When the g & o are glossy and starting to get soft, add the celery and mushrooms.  When that's all about halfway cooked (not fresh, but not wilty), transfer the works to a bowl.  Stir in the nuts, Gruyere and nutmeg.  Taste it to see if it needs salt.  It probably does, so add some.

There.  Your stuffing is done.  Pull out the squash, stuff with stuffing, and stuff stuffed squashes back into the oven for another hour.  Remove from oven.  Stuff squash and stuffing into self.